The Weight of Grace

Many times in my life, I’ve heard people say, “Just give me grace.” Without thinking, my impatience and indignation often fuel my response. I put the person on an internal clock—a mental countdown for how long they have until my “grace” runs dry. Or I add another tally to how many times I have already done this. Yet, how would I feel if God did this to me? I never truly considered what it means to give grace—until I tried, recently, to look at it from God’s perspective.

In Matthew 18:21-22, Peter asks Jesus, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus responds, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Jesus’s response shows us that grace can’t be measured or rationed. The seemingly random number reflects that it doesn’t matter if it’s 777. It’s not about keeping count. It’s about embodying a limitless, unconditional love. It’s about reflecting the grace we have received from God.

Grace is no simple thing. The Bible says to love God with all our heart. It also says to love our neighbor as ourselves. These are the two great commandments, with a profound implication woven in. Loving others assumes we understand what it means to love ourselves. The Bible calls us to love God, see ourselves as He does, and extend that same love to others. Grace is integral to that love. It’s a care package from God that contains compassion, love, forgiveness, patience, humility, and a lack of judgment. Because grace is freely given to us by God, we are called to receive it into ourselves and freely give it to others. We are made in His image, after all, and called to reflect His nature. But if that’s true, why is it so hard to give grace?

Grace challenges us. It requires two things. First, we must see others in their God-given potential. Second, we must recognize that same potential in ourselves. Often, our struggle begins with the latter. If we cannot see ourselves as image-bearers of God, it becomes harder to extend that grace to others. Imagine if you could see your neighbor as they will be in eternity, fully realized in all their splendor. You might be so overwhelmed by their beauty and majesty that you’d fall on your face in awe. But then you would have to say, “Wait a minute, I’m also an image-bearer.” Seeing ourselves as God sees us transforms not only how we view ourselves but also how we see others. It lifts the burden of grace. It reminds us that it’s not about perfection. It’s about reflecting the unconditional love we’ve received.

My mom once told me about her moment of salvation. It was when she realized that God loved her, even though she didn’t feel worthy of it. “Me?” She said, “God loves me?” Romans 5:8 ties beautifully to her experience: “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Similarly, what astonished me recently was realizing how God sees me. That His grace comes from His viewpoint. He exists in eternity. I exist in time. Meaning, He does not see me only in my brokenness; He sees me how I will be in eternity, perfect and complete. This is difficult for me to fathom.

We find value in ourselves and people based on what we see in our limited perspective. We make all sorts of assumptions of goodness and badness based on external factors like; wealth, status, and appearance. God sees beneath the surface and beyond. People are more than they appear, filled with spirit and endless possibility. So, we should respond as God does: with patience, love, and kindness.

Grace weighs on us for this very reason. It demands a different set of eyes. It’s easy to forgive a stranger who cuts you off in traffic, but much harder when the offense comes from a loved one. Think about how long you sit with the hurt, how much it angers you, and how hard it is to let go.

Now multiply that by billions. God extends grace to every soul on earth. This includes those who deny Him, worship false gods, or live in rebellion. His grace is unlimited, universal, and unconditional. It’s a weight He carries with zero effort. Forgiving one person can feel impossible. Now, imagine extending grace to every person on earth—8 billion flawed souls. That’s God!

Proverbs 19:11 offers wisdom here: “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” When we pass over a transgression, we reflect God’s glory. Grace transforms our relationships. It mirrors God’s patience and forgiveness. Human pride often blocks us from extending grace. We think others should “earn” our forgiveness. We forget that grace, by definition, is unearned. But God, in His infinite love, calls us to rise above this natural impulse.

The work of Christ on the cross demonstrates our worth to God. We live in a world that often undervalues life. But Jesus’ sacrifice shows our value and how much we mean to Him. By laying down His life, He showed that grace is costly yet freely given, inviting us to value others as He values us. With Him, we become new creatures—renewed in mind and vision.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible is when Paul talks about the thorn in his flesh. He begged God to remove it, but God replied, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9) When Paul reflected on his thorn, he likely felt shame and guilt. I’ve found that guilt or shame often leads to harsher judgments of others. This weakens the grace we give others and causes us to hide, which is the opposite of what God wants. God wants us to walk confidently in our identity, and in Paul’s case, his authority. Paul’s thorn reminded him of his humanity, but it also became a platform for God’s strength. This truth also challenges us to believe that just as God has transformed us, He can transform others. When we embrace grace, it lifts us beyond our weaknesses, allowing us to reflect God’s love more fully.

When we accept God’s grace, we are called to extend it to others. It’s not easy—it’s heavy. Seeing others as God does, and ourselves in that light, makes grace a gift, not a burden. If you’re struggling to show grace, start by praying for the person who has hurt you. Ask God to help you see them as He does. Then take one small step: forgive, don’t judge, don’t retaliate. The weight of grace is heavy, but we don’t carry it alone. Let us carry it as Christ carried the cross—with humility, love, and the vision of who we all can be in eternity. And let us remember, as Proverbs 19:11 says, that it is to our glory to pass over a transgression.

I leave you with one question: who in your life could you extend grace to today?

Wrestling With God

And Jacob was left alone. And a man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he touched his hip socket, and Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, “Let me go, for the day has broken.” But Jacob said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.” And he said to him, “What is your name?” And he said, “Jacob.” Then he said, “Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with men, and have prevailed.” Then Jacob asked him, “Please tell me your name.” But he said, “Why is it that you ask my name?” And there he blessed him. — Genesis 32:24-29 ESV

Genesis has always held a special place in my heart, captivating me since childhood with its depth and richness. With each reading, I discover new layers of profound meaning. Within its pages lies the story of my favorite biblical character, Jacob – a fellow grappler whose life resonates deeply with my own experience.

Jacob's entire narrative is defined by struggle. From the very beginning, he wrestled with his twin brother Esau in the womb (Genesis 25:22), setting the tone for a life marked by constant grappling – with himself, with others, and ultimately with God Himself. At the core of Jacob's struggles was his persistent reliance on his own cleverness rather than trusting in God's provision.

His story is a masterclass in self-reliance: he manipulated his way into his brother's birthright (Genesis 25:29-34), worked fourteen years to marry his beloved Rachel (after being tricked into marrying her sister Leah first) (Genesis 29:15-30), and even outsmarted his uncle Laban through clever breeding techniques I still struggle to fully comprehend (Genesis 30:37-43). Throughout it all, Jacob demonstrated an unwavering determination to achieve his goals through his own means, repeatedly choosing his way over God's.

This all came to a head one fateful night at the river Jabbok. The context is crucial: the next day, Jacob was set to face Esau for the first time since fleeing his brother's murderous rage years before. Alone with his thoughts and fears, likely exhausted from planning every possible angle to ensure his survival, Jacob encountered a mysterious wrestler – God Himself.

What happens next is fascinating. The text tells us that Jacob was winning the match, a detail that has long perplexed me until I realized what it represented: Jacob's own will was still attempting to overcome God's. Even in this divine encounter, he was fighting to maintain control. That's when God touched Jacob's hip socket, dislocating it with supernatural ease. Pop! As any grappler knows, the hips are the foundation of our strength. With this single touch, God rendered Jacob physically powerless.

But here's where the story takes its profound turn. Instead of submitting or fleeing, Jacob clings to God with even greater determination, refusing to let go until he receives a blessing. In this moment of complete physical vulnerability, Jacob finally surrenders his self-reliance while simultaneously demonstrating his unshakeable faith. He acknowledges his weakness and chooses to hold fast to God as his only source of strength.

The transformation is both spiritual and physical. Jacob emerges with a permanent limp – a daily reminder of human frailty – and a new name, Israel, "because you have struggled with God and with man and have prevailed.” The victory, paradoxically, came through surrender.

This story reminds me that we cannot avoid wrestling with God if we truly seek to know Him. After exhausting our own resources and strategies, we must approach Him with fear and trembling to cross into unknown territory. Jacob's experience teaches us that sometimes our greatest victories come through vulnerability and surrender rather than strength and strategy.

The epilogue to this wrestling match is equally powerful. When Jacob finally meets Esau, he's met not with violence but with grace (Genesis 33:4). As he presents gifts to his brother, Esau initially declines, saying he has enough. Jacob – now Israel – responds with transformed perspective: because God had dealt graciously with him the night before, and his brother had received him with the same grace, he insists Esau accept the gifts, declaring, "I have enough" (Genesis 33:11).

This final statement beautifully captures the change in Jacob's heart. The man who had spent his life grasping for more finally understood that in surrendering to God, he had everything he needed.

One Cross at a Time

Then said Jesus unto his disciples, if any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? — Matthew 16:24-26

One of the enemy's most effective strategies in today’s world is convincing us to carry more than one cross at a time. He does this with a cunning purpose: when we're overburdened with multiple crosses, he can present temptations as a way to put them down, offering false relief from the very weight he encouraged us to take on.

As humans, we are bound by time, perceiving it linearly through past, present, and future—a perspective fundamentally different from God's eternal view. Though the enemy isn't constrained by time as we are, he expertly exploits our temporal nature, burdening us with crosses from our past and anxieties about crosses yet to come.

Through worry and fear, we forget a simple truth: these burdens cannot all manifest simultaneously. Some crosses have already been carried, while others may never materialize. Yet in attempting to shoulder them all, we exhaust ourselves trying to manufacture extra patience, fortitude, and strength. This directly contradicts Jesus's clear instruction: "Take no thought for tomorrow, for tomorrow shall take thought for things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof." (Matthew 6:34) With these words, Jesus reveals that worry is not only unnecessary but unproductive.

When we occupy ourselves with hypothetical crosses—burdens that exist only in our minds—we take on weight that God never intended us to bear. I believe God's assistance diminishes with these self-imposed burdens. Consider the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13), where we're taught to ask for our "daily bread." This isn't merely about physical sustenance; it represents everything God provides to sustain us through each day.

The emphasis on "daily" is no accident—God's provision is intentionally measured in daily portions. This divine rationing has profound significance: we are closest to God in the present moment, in the Now. It's here, in this moment, where our relationship with Him is most intimate and our faith most active.

Why does God prefer this daily approach? Two profound reasons emerge. First, we simply aren't strong enough to bear multiple crosses. Our human limitations are not a design flaw but a feature that draws us closer to God. Second, when we attempt to carry multiple crosses, we inadvertently deny God the opportunity to demonstrate how His strength is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). God desires our genuine dependence on Him because He alone is infinite, along with His good gifts. Our finite nature means we will invariably fall short when relying on our own strength.

Faith in God isn't just counted as righteousness—it's the profound recognition that our infinite God can and does act within our finite world. Jesus offered this beautiful invitation in Matthew 11:28-30: "Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."

The remarkable truth about carrying one cross at a time is that Jesus has already blazed this trail. He carried the ultimate cross, making our daily crosses "light work" in comparison. When we find ourselves struggling under multiple crosses, it's often pride, fear, or doubt at work rather than faithful obedience. If you're wondering why God seems distant or unresponsive to your struggles, perhaps it's time to examine how many crosses you're attempting to bear. The path to peace might begin with simply letting go and embracing the grace of carrying just one cross—today's cross—with Jesus by your side.

The Journey of Faith

When we truly contemplate faith, it can be a frightening prospect. Looking back at the great fathers of faith—Abraham, who was willing to sacrifice his son (Genesis 22); Job, who maintained his faith through unimaginable suffering (Job 1-2); and Noah, who built an ark before rain existed (Genesis 6-7)—we quickly realize how far we have to go on our own spiritual journeys, and to be frank, it’s both awe-inspiring and terrifying. Their stories of unwavering trust in the face of impossible odds and circumstances stand in stark contrast to our modern lives, where faith often takes a backseat to daily routines and comfortable certainties.

Many of us, myself included, live in a world of predictable pleasures and manageable challenges. We find contentment in our careers, health, relationships, and material comforts—all wonderful gifts from God, to be sure (James 1:17). Yet there's a profound difference between this everyday happiness and the deeper joy that comes through faith. While we gratefully accept these earthly blessings, we must recognize that God offers us something far greater: a faith that operates on the scale of His infinite love, something that transcends our limited human understanding (Ephesians 3:17-19).

This divine joy, born of complete trust in God, stands apart from our circumstantial happiness. It's a joy that persists through uncertainty, endures through suffering, and deepens through loss (James 1:2-4). I'll be the first to admit—this level of faith doesn't come easily to me. But there's comfort in knowing that God understands our struggles. He assures us that even faith as tiny as a mustard seed is enough (Matthew 17:20), and that His strength is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Our earthly satisfactions—however pleasant they may be—are inherently temporary (Matthew 6:19-20). Rather than seeing this as a source of despair, we can understand it as God's gentle reminder of our deep need for something more permanent. As Scripture tells us, God has "set eternity in the human heart" (Ecclesiastes 3:11). Every fleeting joy points to our soul's fundamental longing for connection with the infinite—a yearning that no earthly pleasure can fully satisfy.

This spiritual awakening rarely happens overnight. The ups and downs we experience are part of God's grace package, His patient way of leading us to the realization that we need Him (Romans 5:3-5). It requires tremendous humility to acknowledge that even our most successful, comfortable lives remain incomplete without this divine connection (Philippians 3:7-8). Even at our highest peaks of earthly achievement, there remains a space that only faith can fill.

This isn't meant as a criticism of life's pleasures or an argument for ascetic denial. Rather, it's an invitation to embrace something more profound—the deep, abiding joy that comes through faith. Yes, this requires a leap beyond our comfort zone, beyond what logic alone can justify. It asks us to surrender to something greater than ourselves (Proverbs 3:5-6). But in that surrender, we find what our hearts have always been searching for: a joy that transcends all earthly circumstances, rooted in the eternal love of God (Romans 8:38-39).

Genesis 3:17-19

"And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return." - Genesis 3:17-19 (KJV)

In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve enjoyed unrestricted access to the Tree of Life, a direct source of sustenance from God Himself. However, after the fall, everything changed. This passage reveals not just a physical curse, but a profound spiritual reality that still echoes through humanity today.

When Jesus later declared, "I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst" (John 6:35), He was addressing this very separation that occurred in Eden. The connection between physical and spiritual sustenance runs deep throughout Scripture.

A crucial detail often overlooked is the phrase "cursed is the ground for thy sake." While this certainly refers to the literal earth, there's a deeper significance here. Adam, whose very name means "from the ground," was formed from the dust of the earth. As the text explicitly states, "for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art." This suggests that the curse on the ground was also a curse on human nature itself.

The consequences were severe. Where once there was direct communion with God, now humanity must "work out your salvation with fear and trembling" (Philippians 2:12). We face a world where sin "lieth at the door" (Genesis 4:7), and our adversary "walketh about, seeking whom he may devour" (1 Peter 5:8). The thorns and thistles mentioned aren't just physical obstacles – they represent the spiritual struggles we face in a fallen world.

These thorns manifest as worldly desires, fear, anxiety, worry, depression, guilt, shame, bitterness, and unforgiveness. Like weeds in a garden, these ‘spiritual’ thorns choke out the fruit of the Spirit in our lives when we let them take root, and like Adam and Eve, make it difficult to trust God fully.

Even Paul spoke of such a thorn, saying "there was given to me a thorn in the flesh…” (2 Corinthians 12:7). When he pleaded with the Lord three times to remove it, the response was profound: "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9). Like the thorns from the curse in Eden, our struggles serve to keep us dependent on God's grace.

This exile from Eden transformed life from effortless communion with God into a relentless search for meaning and purpose. The toil mentioned – "in the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread" – speaks to both physical labor and spiritual striving. Without God, humans exhaustingly seek satisfaction in things that cannot truly fulfill.

Yet, this passage ultimately points us toward hope. Christ offers what the Garden once provided: rest from our labors, both physical and spiritual. As He promised, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light" (Matthew 11:28-30).

The curse of the ground reminds us of our origin, our fallen state, and most importantly, our desperate need for redemption – a redemption found only in Christ, who became the true Bread of Life for a hungering world.